Sunshine

Dear David,

You were proud of me today for getting the jump on job prospects, and also for my homemade tomato sauce which was “better than yours” (thanks, Joy of Cooking). The best part of the day was relaxing into the weekend with you.

The morning started slow, the early afternoon was a downer, but the end of the was sunshine.

Thank you,

S

Love Letters

What if…

The first hundred days ended in love letters instead of data?

Dear Potato,

We woke up on the twin bed, warm in the cold front room. The night before ended in last minute arrangements and exhaustion, but most importantly – it ended in family time.

Our slow morning was so much like the night before. You decided to join me on my “trip to Coventry”, and I love those moments because it’s so much like getting to take home with me. You insisted on driving despite my feeble offers. Let the debate rage on

Thank you for encouraging my professional life forward, even if you had to stimulate my competitive side.

Being home with Mom and Mitch comforted me. I feel, with hopes stacked tidy, that you and I have so much to look forward to in the years ahead.

Thinking of late night cuddles,

S

Playing Nurse

I headed to Brooklyn on a sticker mission for work.

You came home early with lymph-nodes exploding.

I made vegetable broth, and nursing maneuvers.

Pleasure reading, letting you sleep, and easing into the Thanksgiving break.

Get-Well Veggie Broth

Water brought to a boil. All the leftover veggies in your fridge and on your bar top: 1 whole (medium) onion, mushroom stems and (3) mushroom caps, carrots, celery greens, herbs (nothing spicy for the sick boy). A dab of butter. Dash of salt? What else?

Bring to boil, then let simmer for 60-90 minutes.

The Joy of Cooking says you can put your whole onion in the broth without peeling or cutting it. This adds to the broth color (allegedly).

Broth seemed to the satisfaction of the sick boy, and after a long sleep, he seemed better.

Guest Post

Title: first 60 days have been great

Sam is reasonable, fun, sexy and hard working. The first 60 of marriage have been just like these traits.

Most of our time is spent working, which is normal and good. I’m still super impressed that she’s going to school full time and working. We’ve had measured discussions where she’s been reasonable. And we’ve gone dancing – which is sexy – and we’ve also gone on vacation, which was fun.

I joke with my friends that the first two months of marriage are easy. Sam’s been great.

Broken Stairs and Budgets

How do I break up my day, you ask?

Stairs, my friends. Stairs.

IMG_7897
Alas, unlike TRADITIONAL STAIRS, these machines break. For today’s workout, I moved to the rowing machine.

I’ve been on a stairs kick. I like to see how long I can last before total exhaustion, and I like to read while I step (–got that Anne of Green Gables addiction–).  Then I chase it with an upper body session on the assisted pull-up / dip machine.

David and I are having a great debate about Planet Fitness, and fitness more generally. You see, the PF gym is right across the street from us. I would like David to join PF. David would not like to join because he says the chain is prejudiced. A New York Times article from 2006 summarized the issue:

Planet Fitness bills itself as “The Judgment Free Zone.” But in the weeks since Mr. Argibay was booted, a number of members have accused the gym of judging with extreme prejudice, saying the club humiliates members whose physiques are too chiseled and who take their workouts too seriously. And the incident has raised other imponderable questions.

Where do you stand on gym grunting?

Personally, I am happy to keep my grunts at a minimum for a rate of $10/month, $0.05 down, no commitment. (And a $42/annual fee, but that’s in the fine print and who reads the fine print?)

The New York City winter is beginning and that’s my best angle in the will-David-become-a-PF-member debacle.

To David’s credit, he completes a good number of apartment workouts. He keeps a black Patagonia backpack stuffed with cushions and a 45lb kettle bell. He does a variety of exercises with that (squats, presses, etc).

I tell David in a message that:

Signing you up for Planet Fitness is really about me. I am more motivated to have a kickass workout when you’re there.

And that’s true. Besides, you get over the awful purple and yellow branding after a little while. And the place makes for good people watching.

David says I don’t listen to him when we workout together. I explain that it’s because I always saw him in the friend-partner role, not the trainer role.

Ah, relationship fun. But you know what they say: couples who sweat together, stay together.


On a separate note and not entirely unrelated to buying David a gym membership, I want to:

A) Check-in on my finances and budgeting
and,
B) Get better at giving people gifts

Doing A always helps me feel better about doing B, especially when costs money. Any tips for becoming a better gift-giver?

(We are fast-approaching the season of giving.)



Alert! David is writing a guest post tomorrow! Look for it. Who knows? Maybe there will even be some wife-o-meter data…

Bagels and Pita Chips

Bad dreams wiped away by husband cuddles. Another day to sleep in and enjoy family time. Breakfast was leftover bagels topped with everything, and coffee. David and I watched a video about the 1950s French involvement in Vietnam.

A morning excursion to Portland City Center featured a charming bakery, a well-balanced thrift shop with a little bit of everything, and novelty shop equipped with thank you cards and cute oven mits.

After that, we said goodbye to Sophie and packed up Tom’s car. The drive is a blur of conversation, music, media consumption, naps.

Lunch was also dinner? A rest stop was involved. Think: skimpy overpriced salad, pita chips (unexpectedly covered with cinnamon sugar), guacamole extras and large fries from McDonald’s.

We dropped Caroline and Kristin at their dad’s place, and had the opportunity to visit there for a little while.

Then we returned to Chapel. I retrieved my jacket from the basement, and the boys unloaded love on Rocky (the family companion).

The rest of the night was spent driving back to the city, hunting for parking in our neighborhood, hauling things back to the apartment, chugging seltzer and settling in…

We bickered over David’s recent line of complaint: I am oppositional and he doesn’t feel his opinions are valued. He presented the complaint in the form of comparing me to one of his relatives.

Please take a moment to imagine my data project, the “Husbometer“, making squeaky, break-down noises.

What other strategic objectives do we have for our coupledom in these last of the 100 days?

My thoughts return to a post-nup, and a yearning to mitigate some relationship stressors (my gainful employment).

 

Assorted Updates

First, let’s check in on married life (since that’s the theme of this 100 day stretch):
Married life is good.

Next up a series of disjointed thoughts:
– Mid-term elections are tomorrow.
– I’m enjoying reading Anne of Avonlea (the second book in the Anne of Green Gables series). Check out my review for Anne of Green Gables and be my friend on GoodReads.
– I’m leaving for Syracuse and the New York Library Association conference tomorrow.
– I’m looking forward to voting in the morning. Here’s the sample ballot for my neighborhood.
– I want to write a little more for National Novel Writing Month. I was thinking about ideas, concepts, characters during my train rides. I wish I wrote down my thoughts on paper. I don’t remember my conclusions.
– Bloating. Why do I feel bloated?
– I think back on my holiday postcard design for EveryLibrary’s lapsed donors.
– I have homework due tomorrow that I actually need to get done.

I decide to research my ballot instead. David does more work-work on the computer beside me.

Contra

Husbometer check-in:

Category Date Score Week
Sex (Quantity, Quality) 11/3/18 0.9 7
Communication 11/3/18 0.6 7
Chores 11/3/18 0.6 7
Fitness & Health 11/3/18 0.8 7
Finances 11/3/18 0.5 7
Trust 11/3/18 0.6 7
Dealing w/ Everybody Else 11/3/18 0.7 7
Food 11/3/18 0.8 7
Little things 11/3/18 0.7 7

Soon I’ll start blogging about NaNoWriMo too. I think one important thing in marriage is to keep doing interesting things (by and for yourself).

Tonight, David and I went to a contra dance in the west village. It was so much fun!

Contra dance
I spy David!

Afterward, we went to John’s of Bleecker Street for some renowned NYC pizza.

The contra reminded me of our wedding dances.

And WOAH!

We’re halfway through the FIRST 100 DAYS OF MARRIAGE!

Zippity Do Da

Getting excited over here. Fresh out of online class (IST 613: Library Planning, Marketing and Assessment).

Text: inside the brain of a grad student...

TO-DOO da-day!

Immediate future

Tomorrow

  • Organize plan of attack for work (tomorrow and beyond)
    • Stakeholder surveys
      • Compile library campaign contacts (or use Nationbuilder database?)
    • Staff surveys
  • Use  form results to create service recommendation
  • Residual or ongoing tasks
    • Donor postcard
    • Social media upkeep
      • NYT article author quotes (multiple platforms)
      • Vineland (remaining posts on social media schedule)
  • Internship paperwork
    • Print and re-share evaluation
    • Resubmit assignment

Beyond

  • Assessment report
    • Prioritize completion of section 1
      • Earmark assessment worksheets
  • Project management refresher
    • Answer course module prompts
    • Skim Lynda course content
  • Submit job applications
    • Development work: Resume / CV / Portfolio
  • Miscellaneous
    • Check-in with finances
    • Touch base with fitness plan
    • Review community garden bylaws
    • Research my ballot before November 6th
    • Complete wedding thank you notes

Oh, husband. I am thinking back on last night. We were talking about plans for Thanksgiving and family. I think you were upset by the conversation. When the conversation changed, the mood remained. I heard you say something about our neighborhood using the word indigents. I perceived a negative (belittling) connotation and said so in my critical response.

Word of the day:

Indigent

in·di·gent
/ˈindəjənt/

Adjective

1suffering from extreme poverty IMPOVERISHED

2  aarchaic DEFICIENT
    barchaic totally lacking in something specified

I woke up too early, feeling troubled. I worked it out with yoga by candlelight, early breakfast, and pleasure reading Anne of Green Gables. You came looking for me around 6am. We returned to bed together, with plenty of time to spare for pre-work cuddling and canoodling.

So far it seems easy to find our way back from most emotional side trails.